Not to keep beating a dead horse, but I really wanted to write a follow up blog for you guys about how I’ve been doing since I last talked about my breakup. I know there are a lot of women out there going through or have been what I have, and may have trouble moving on and letting go. I want to reach out to someone who may be having a tougher time than I did. I want to help others.
A lot of people may not understand why I am so openly comfortable discussing this issue on the internet for the world to hear, let me explain.
This book helped me, A LOT. But honestly, I got halfway through it in 2 days, and I was already over it (and I don’t mean over the book itself) The thing is, when you realize your self-worth, you can get through anything. ANYTHING. You cry, you sulk, you get angry, let it all out. But at the end of the day, there are infants and children starving around the world, there are wives getting the lives beaten out of them from men who claim they love them, someone in this world lost their home, their job, their daughter, father, or son today or yesterday. All of these things happen in life and life STILL goes on. So there’s no way in HELL I will mourn the loss of a silly ass man. He is only a man, nothing more, and nothing less.
A viewer commented on my Breakup video and said something along the lines of I was lying for being so comfortable on camera and that if I wasn’t honest with myself it would catch up to me later. For one, there’s a time and place for all of the crying, hurt and anger, YouTube is not the right place for that. Two, some people handle situations differently than others. I for one know that once I’ve had it with something or someone, I’ve HAD IT. Done, finito. No questions asked. This isn’t the first breakup I’ve been through and it won’t be the last. People forget that I’ve been married before. Divorces are expensive, but breakups are usually (not always) cheaper and it’s often easier to just cut your loses and move on versus being tied to someone legally and on paper. Either way, life still goes on, and the breakup I went through is nothing compared to the things I’ve experienced in my 25 years of living, and THAT ladies and gentlemen is why I have been handling this so well.
Having an amazing support system helps. The fact that I was able to find these things out when I was visiting home on emergency leave and then had the opportunity to come back to Kuwait has helped A LOT too.
Staying BUSY as hell helps a lot. The fact that I have a job which includes 60-70 hours of work per week AND vlogging and blogging on the side weekly helps.
Whatever you do, rid yourself of any negativity and immense yourself in something you enjoy doing. After you’ve cried it all out and come to terms with the issue, of course.
THE biggest reason as to why I was able to get over my breakup so well? I believe my relationship ended a long time ago. Before I found out about the sideline chick, and the fact that she was pregnant with his child, ALL the signs were there. Every last one of them. I just didn’t know where the signs were pointing to. Trust and believe when I say this, a woman ALWAYS knows. Even when she doesn’t know, she just knows.
Something was wrong; there was an overwhelmingly loud voice in the back of my mind telling me “this man is not the one for you” I couldn’t understand why or where it was coming from, I couldn’t justify it, I had no concrete proof. But I’ve known well since the beginning of this year that mentally, phsyically and spiritually it was just time for me to move on. And so that’s what I began to do.
Months ago, in the midst of my relationship I woke up one day feeling different. I loved this man, I literally thought I would marry him and have his kids someday. But as much as I did love him, I came to the realization that should something happen to us, life would still go on without him.
*all images courtesy of Google*
Of course nobody knew any of this was going on. Not even my closest family or friends. I always kept my relationship in a positive light, I never spoke negatively about it either. You just don’t do that. You don’t get to cheat in the midst of your relationship just because you feel it may be coming to an end either (for those that use that as an excuse to creep behind a partner’s back). I ride or die all the way through. And that’s exactly what I did. So when I found out my boyfriend of almost two years was cheating on me while I’ve been overseas and got another girl pregnant, THAT for me, ladies and gentlement was the straw that broke the camel’s back. It was THE last straw. It was kind of like “oh you’re ALREADY f*ckin up and now I have to deal with THIS?! That is why it was so easy to drop it like a ton of bricks. And that’s exactly what I’ve done, and I haven’t looked back since.
“ Sometimes God removes people from your life so abruptly so that you don’t hesitate to look back”
The one thing I want you to take away from this blog post is, to follow your heart. I know I know, it’s the typical thing to say in a situation like this, but that’s because it’s true! Your intuition is somehow, always right. I can’t explain how, or why. But if something doesn’t feel right, it’s not. Period. I am so blessed for all of the trials I’ve been through because they’ve made me who I am today. And if it wasn’t for my intuition I’d probably be in some pretty miserable places with some pretty miserable people.
Goodbye for right now doesn’t mean you still can’t have a happy ending.
Until next time my loves thank you for reading.